Letters not sent

Heli KГјnnapas

A Few Nights Of Romance

Romantic short novel "Letters not sent" follows the story of Miia. She lives in Tallinn, the capital of Estonia, and manages a small dance school while raising two kids with her husband. Unexpectedly, Miia finds out that she has inherited half a house in a small village called Pärnu - Jaagupi. The house is left to her by the grandmother of her previous best friends Simon. She and Simon fell apart 15 years ago and haven't talked since. How do these news change Miia's life? What kind of memories and feelings resurface at the old house? How is the presence altered when the unsent letters from the past reach the recipient now? "Letters not sent" is the third short novel in the series "A Few Nights of Romance" by Estonian writer Heli Künnapas, but the first one to be published in English. All the novels are readable separately.

Translated from Estonian original by Katrin Haiba and Karin Künnapas, 2018. Designed by Liis Karu Published by: Heli Kirjastus OÜ Jädivere küla, Märjamaa vald 78013 ESTONIA www.helikirjastus.ee Copyright © 2018 by Heli Künnapas ISBN 978-9949-7208-8-0 (epub)

1.What’s the cost of your inspiration?

“I can’t do this! Seriously, I can’t do this anymore!” I push the laptop away from me along the kitchen table. Lauri gives me smirk and returns to sipping his morning coffee and scrolling the news on his phone. I snap “Can you hear me? I’m so sick of this city. I can’t work here!”

“Yes, I’ve heard it all before,” Lauri grumbles under his breath, brushing invisible flakes off his pants with the back of his hand. His hair is as flawless as his suit, combed perfectly straight and right. Not a single strand out of place. My blonde mop presents quite the opposite picture – a classic morning „bed head” with each curl pointing in a different direction. “I know, now you’ll say how your job is so special and you need your inspiration and you can’t do it anywhere and anytime. Seriously, come down to Earth someday everybody goes to work in the morning, makes an effort, works hard and gets the job done whether they like it or not.”

“I knew it’s pointless discuss this with you,” I stand up too quickly and almost knock over my chair. With the grace and speed of a dancer I manage to catch it before it falls, but this manages to annoy me even more - even the chair doesn’t want to cooperate with me. I stomp to the cupboard, grab the cup with Florida written on it and pour myself some hot coffee.

We went to Florida a few years ago. I have vivid memories of feeling intensely exhilarated while watching a pod of dolphins playing around in the ocean during sunset. Moments like that inspire me to create the next dance performances, help me understand people, relationships and everything that surrounds me and put it all into the language of motion. Not the gray walls of stone and smothering masses of humanity that fill Tallinn.

“Miia, of course you can talk to me, but try to understand... imagine if I would say, even just once a month, that I don’t have any inspiration today and this space and these people oppress me, then the whole company’s accounting would grind to a halt”.

“Don’t pat yourself on the back! You’re a CFO. Accountants do all the work, you sign off on it and cash a large paycheck at the end of the month”, I snap at him. Coffee cups from all over the world are a proof of that. We have gone on a long holiday at least once a year, always for Lauri’s money. I opened a dance school a few years back and teach children there. Not a road to riches... but money’s never been my goal. I want to… change the world? Or? Geez, I don’t even know myself anymore.

Whatever it is that I want, I cannot get it right here and now. I push a stubborn strand of hair away from my face. As if to spite me, it falls right back. I feel completely stuck. And my husband keeps scrolling through the news on his phone, treating my lack of inspiratio