The football of all my life! …and 2 stories: «Footballer's wedding», «Once upon a time air kiss!»
Natalie Ponomareva
To your attention the prose of the singing poetess Natalie Ponomaryova of www.певицанэт.рф is presented to “The football of all my life!” and 2 comedy-stories “Footballer’s wedding”, “Once upon a time air kiss!”
The football ofВ all myВ life!
…and 2 stories: «Footballer's wedding», «Once upon a time air kiss!»
Natalie Ponomareva
Photograph Serj Shuvalov
Translator http://www.translate.ru/
© Natalie Ponomareva, 2017
© Serj Shuvalov, photos, 2017
© http://www.translate.ru/, translation, 2017
ISBNВ 978-5-4485-7621-8
Created with Ridero smart publishing system
Once upon aВ time AIR-KISS!
story
There was aВ football ball ofВ the great Brazilian football player Ronaldo. Ronaldo sent it toВ play toВ the friend-goalkeeper-fan! The trainer drew toВ him eyes and aВ smile. Here what handsome man turnedВ out!
And here our lover in Ronaldo the football player instead of a game in the field began to sprinkle Ronaldo’s ball with air-kisses. The trainer tore on himself hair!
– Idiot! – the trainer shouted. The ball was in gate… The arbitrator’s whistle sounds. Break. One player was already waited in shower by the girl to have sex (the guy suffered 2 weeks). The doctor examined team. Everything is all right. And here he was treated with a strange water with Chile pepper… The trainer suggested to drink to the defender… that took 1 sip – in a mouth the FIRE! All team similar to a 11-glavovy firedrake ran to drink water. Who joked of football players? On a tribune football players overturned the fountain with a statue…
Fans were in shock. A form, gaiters, sneakers – everything was in ketchup and the earth…
It was necessary to cause “911” and to send trucks with liquid for washing of ware of “Fairy” from villages of “Villariba” and Villabadzho!
FUTBOLIT’S WEDDING
story
The sun warmed the rays, and Malto lying in a chaise lounge seized the laptop… Already half a year he looks for the bride! But photos of darlings deceived him… Instead of Pamela Anderson kept the appointment curve, cross-eyed unlucky persons with thick as liverny sausages, thighs… Well just Francois Villon’s poetry!
Malta drank 2 cups of coffee… It took a break to beat a boxing pear and cyznm to remove stress…
But here IT entered! Dazzling beauty the blonde with smart long hair also sat down opposite to it. Her look of roasting by brown eyes! As Pushkin would tell, it was “the genius of pure beauty”! Malta treated it with coffee…
But so far Malto waited when the bartender brings coffee, he was horrified when he saw hairy legs ofВ the beauty! Both laughter, and sin: it was the transvestite!
As if scalded by boiled water, Malto ran out from club and ran with a ball towards church… The church was open…
“My dear pastor! I was tired to look for the bride! Marry me, please, here to this football ball: it is my LIFE, LOVE, MONEY, WEALTH and GLORY!”
SOCCER OFВ ALL MY LIFE
Story diary
Life as is aВ lot ofВ football matches or as one big football matche
Germany! I am 18 years old. I got a job the selling assistant in federal network of autoshops. This is the official distributor of the German plant on production of video recorders and antiradars. For dinner I prepare a national German dish – stewed cabbage with fried sausages! The father opened a contribution in Austrian German bank… We bought winter boots to me in the Russian boutique of footwear. The footwear sewed on the German technologies! In music I prefer works of the German composer Ludwig Van Beethoven! In the evenings I become engrossed in reading of the novel by the German postmodernist Patrik Suskind! Das ist ja fast wie zu Hause! And in the childhood I collected toys from the German Kinder Surprise chocolate.
Father’s call. He is a football coach of team of one local plant.
The
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